Options

If you're still in love with them:

Option 1: I think your best bet is to judge how your partner is feeling about the relationship. If they're blowing you off and don't care about it any more, then it's time to move on even if it will hurt.

Option 2: If your partner still loves you and wants to make it work, then give it another try! Rekindle away! If you both want your relationship to work, and are willing to do your part, it will most likely succeed.

If you're not in love with them any more:

Option 1: If your partner doesn't love you, want to spend time with you, or talk to you any more then there's no point in trying again. You've both basically started to move on. It's time to jump off that wagon. The ship has set sail.

Option 2: If your partner still loves you, but you don't love them in return. This is hardest of all for me. I think your best bet is looking at the relationship honestly. Yeah, you're gonna hurt your partner, but if you really see no future in that relationship, then treat it like a band-aid. Rip it off and let it be done with. It will only hurt them more the longer you let it go on.

When am I ready to move on?

After a break up I don't think anyone is really "ready" to move on. Unless, of course, you're the one who ended it. For me, I try to get closure in the relationship. Closure meaning you talk about what went wrong, why it's not working, why you need to separate. I'm kind of a logical person, so it helps knowing. However, I'm not trying to rekindle here. If you had a nasty break up and getting closure ends up being more of talking it out, then you could get back together when things are solved. Usually though, once they leave.. they mean it. So, don't think that talking it out will suddenly change their mind. It's purely a strategy to help you move on.

For girls at least, we like to talk about it with a friend, cry it out, and those sorts of things. The biggest part of knowing if you're ready to move on is if you've accepted it. If you're still trying to get back together, then chances are you're not ready. However, you can accept it and still not be ready to move on. It's hard to say, "This means you're ready." It's more of a personal thing. Some characteristics I would associate with being ready are: acceptance, closure, realizing you're still worth something without that person, flirting with new potential partners.. etc.

-Audrey